I am listening to a book I have listened to more than three times now. Every time I seem to catch something that had not necessarily stood out before. It hasn’t been that much time since I have read and re read it, within a year or so.
I am sure one simple answer would be that things come to you when you need them and are ready to hear, learn, see and accept them. Some of the things I had heard and remembered hearing still cause a deep hearted reaction in me.
My thoughts on these things I was feeling, is that I realize how many “difficult” people I have encountered in my life, my personal/family/friendship areas of life. I would have to be blind, dumb and deaf not to realize there is a lesson to learn, one that has been hard for me to do. I see clear patterns to my reactions, behaviors, self imposed punishments, denial, negotiating, and dealings with these difficult personalities in my life.
I have recently really started to put up boundaries, “Drawing a line in the sand”, I am learning to walk away from relationships or circumstances that no longer serve me, and only cause me pain and anguish. It has been extremely challenging for me to do, especially in the beginning. Causing me horrible anxiety, inability to sleep, anger and fear. All things that only affect my well being, mental and physical health.
I am Thankful I am able to forgive and let go. Praying I have and am learning my lessons, and no longer feeling self pity or anger against myself.
Thankful, Grateful and Blessed!