Does the pain/sadness of the absences ever go away or lessen?

 

Today is the anniversary of the day my Grandmother moved into another realm. It has been over 20 years since my Paternal Grandmother passed away from cancer.

Not a day goes by, that I don’t think of her. The memories can make feel happy or sad, but for sure empty in some ways, there is a place in my heart and existence than needs her. She is part of me, I am part of her. My habits, thoughts, behaviors, which are engraved in me.  Every time I cook, I wash dishes, I think of her. When my knees hurt or are sore, I think of sitting with her, talking about the pain in our knees, she was then in her late 60’s me in my early 20’s. Hers from age and working them to the bone. Mine from dancing, horseback ridding, and ice skating.

We (She and I) had very different lives (This lifetime), I know we chose to be in each others life, and to live the experiences we had together. I wish I would have known how little time I would have with her, even though I was 24 years old, when she passed, some of my other cousins did not have the benefit or opportunity of knowing or having her as long as I did, it was still too short of time.

I was incredibly lucky to have had the awesome experience, of having my Grandmother live with us. Priceless!!! She spoiled me, we spent so much time together and had a connection that most of my other cousins did not have, not even my own siblings.

I feel blessed to have known such a selfless person, who loved me unconditionally. Abuelita you are always in heart and in my thoughts. Until we meet again.

Thankful, Grateful & Blessed! 

 

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