I am not sure why I am constantly being told that I need to work things out with my mother. Thinking about the last 48 years of my life, I see all the times I have made the effort, I have tried, I have bitten my tongue and respected her even when she hasn’t deserved it.
I do owe her immense gratitude for the times she has been there for me, has she been all bad, of course not. No one is, all good or all bad.
My challenge is to overcome and make peace with, all the times she has looked at me with such hatred, I wouldn’t even call it a look, I would call it a glare. When I have called it to her attention or brought it up, she has quite literally laughed as if it is something funny and endearing. I mean “Hello!” who would like to be on the receiving end of that? would you feel loved by the person? Being on the receiving end of it, has been a bit soul crushing, her glaring could literally stop you in your tracks.
In the end I wish people who do not understand, or know the chemistry or lack of, to keep their opinions, and advice to themselves. After all, this is my journey.
Thankful, Grateful & Blessed!